笑话大全

Aguyisnotgettingalongwithhiswife.  Hethinksmaybehe'dliketohaveapetandgoestoapetshop.Afterlookingaroundhespotsaparrotsittingonalittleperch.Itdoesn'thaveanyfeetorlegs.
Theguysaysoutloud,"Geez,Iwonderwhathappenedtothisparrot."
"Iwasbornthisway,"saystheparrot."I'madefectiveparrot."
"Ha,ha,"theguylaughs."ItsoundedlikethisparrotactuallyunderstoodwhatIsaidandansweredme."
"Iunderstoodeveryword,"saystheparrot."Iamahighlyintelligent,thoroughlyeducatedbird."
"Yeah?"theguyasks."Thenanswerthis:howdoyouhangontoyourperchwithoutanyfeet?"
"Well,"theparrotsays,"thisisalittleembarrassing,butsinceyouaskedI'lltellyou.Iwrapmylittleparrotpenisaroundthiswoodenbar,kindoflikealittlehook.Youcan'tseeitbecauseofmyfeathers."
"Wow,"saystheguy,"youreallycanunderstandandanswer,can'tyou?"
"Ofcourse.IspeakbothSpanishandEnglish.Icanconversewithreasonablecompetenceonalmostanysubject:politics,religion,sports,physics,philosophy...andIamespeciallygoodatornithology.Yououghttobuyme.Iamagreatcompanion."
Theguylooksatthepricetag."$200!"hesays."Ican'taffordthat."
"Pssst,"theparrothisses,motioningtheguyoverwithonewing."NobodywantsmecauseIdon'thaveanyfeet.Youcangetmefor$20--justmakeanoffer."
Guyoffers$20andwalksoutwiththeparrot.Weeksgoby.Theparrotissensational.He'sfunny,he'sinteresting,he'sagreatpal,heunderstandseverything,sympathizes,givesgoodadvice.Guyisdelighted.
Onedayguycomeshomefromworkandtheparrotsays,"pssst,"andmotionshimoverwithonewing.Guygoesupclosetothecage.
"Idon'tknowifIshouldtellyouthisornot,"saystheparrot,"butit'saboutyourwifeandthemailman..."
"What?"saystheguy."What?"
"Well,"theparrotsays,"whenthemailmancametothedoortodayyourwifegreetedhiminasheernightgownandkissedhimonthemouth."
"Whathappenedthen?"askstheguy.
"Thenthemailmancameintothehouseandliftedupthenightgownandbeganpettingherallover,"reportstheparrot.
"OhNo!"theguysays,"Thenwhat?"
"Thenheliftedupthenightgown,gotdownonhiskneesandbegantolickherbody,startingwithherbreastsandslowlygoingdownanddown..."
Theparrotpausesforalongtime.
"Thenwhat....whathappenedNext...WHATHAPPENED?"saysthefranticguy.
"Idon'tknow,"saystheParrot,"Ifelloffmyperch."