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Things you won’t hear a woman say to another woman

That swimsuit really flatters your figure! Would you mind keeping my husband company while I go for ...(查看全文

Things You Don’t Want to Hear During Surgery

Oops! Has anyone seen my watch? That was some party last night. I can't remember when I've been tha...(查看全文

Laws Of Unreliability

1.Computersareunreliable,buthumansareevenmoreunreliable. 2.Atthesourceofeveryerrorwhichisblamedonth...(查看全文

30 Fun Things To Do At Wal-Mart

1. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store. 2. Set all the alarm clocks to go o...(查看全文

the reason

Father: Your teacher says she finds it impossible to teach you anything! Son   : That's why I say she's no good! 免费(查看全文

Programmer’s Translation

1.ANUMBEROFDIFFERENTAPPROACHESAREBEINGTRIED... Wearestillpissinginthewind. 2.EXTENSIVEREPORTISBEING...(查看全文

The Pillsbury Doughboy Died

It is my sad duty to report that the Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and comp...(查看全文

You Know You’re Drinking Too Much Coffee When...

Juan Valdez names his donkey after you. You ski uphill. You get a speeding ticket even when you're...(查看全文

Blonde Quickies

Why can't blondes take coffee breaks? They're too hard to retrain. How do you know when a blonde h...(查看全文

that’s what i want

Manager      :  Sorry,but I can't give u a job. I don't need much help. Job Applicant: That's all right. In fact I'm just the right person in this case. You see, I won't be of much help anyway!! (查看全文

A new guy

    Anewguyintownwalksintoabarandreadsasignthathangsoverthebar:FREEBEERFORTHEPER...(查看全文

Ponderables?

How do crazy people go through the forest? They take the psycho path. How do you get holy water? B...(查看全文

To scare them

A mother bought her son a $100 Halloween costume to scare his friends. "Should I take the price tag off?" the boy asked. "Leave it on." his mother replied. "We'll scare your father too." (查看全文

10 Ways to Tell If Your Company is Going Under

1.Theystartpayingeveryoneinseashells. 2.TheDairyQueenonthecorneristhreateningahostiletakeover. 3.W...(查看全文

Your Dog is dead

  A lady rushes into the veterinarian and screams, "I found my dog unconscious and I can't...(查看全文

missed school

Teacher: "Chong, u missed school last Friday." Chong  : "You're wrong, Sir."   Teacher: "Wrong, how is that?" Chong  : "I was absent, yes but I certainly didn't miss it!" (查看全文

three girls

Once there was 3 girls. A blonde, red head and a burrnet. They were swimming from one island to ano...(查看全文

The Baby Quiz

Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move? A: With any luck, right after he finishes co...(查看全文

Paint the Porch

A blonde by the name of Julie was getting pretty desperate for money. So she decided to go to the ri...(查看全文

How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?

"How many can you afford?" It only takes one to change your bulb...to his. Two. One to change it a...(查看全文

Top 10 Signs You’ve Got A Bad ISP...

1.Theircompanylogoistwotincansandalengthofstring. 2.Youcheckouttheiraddress,andit'saphoneboothconta...(查看全文

Redneck Etiquette

- Redneck Driving Etiquette - Dim your headlights for approaching vehicles, even if the gun is load...(查看全文

Overworked

For a couple of years I've been blaming it on lack of sleep and too much pressure from my job, but n...(查看全文

Rules to be a Man!!!

1.Don'tcall,ever. 2.Ifyoudon'tlikeagirl,don'ttellher.It'smorefuntoletherfigureitoutbyherself. 3.Li...(查看全文

Where’s My Rolex???!!!!!

A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off...(查看全文

Republicans

HowmanyRepublicansdoesittaketoscrewinalightbulb? A:Two-onetodoitandonetosteadythechandelier. A:None,...(查看全文

Signs You are drunk

You loose arguments with inanimate objects. You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling of...(查看全文

A Family Quarrel

The young newly-weds quarreled. At last she could bear it no longer and burst into tears. "I don't w...(查看全文

say sorry

Dad : "Son, how can you call your aunt stupid? Go and say sorry to her" Son : (goes over to the aunt) "Aunt, I am sorry you are stupid. (查看全文

Beautiful!

One day, during a lesson on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show of hands for who could use ...(查看全文

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