Teacher: "Chong, u missed school last Friday."
Chong : "You're wrong, Sir."
Teacher: "Wrong, how is that?"
Chong : "I was absent, yes but I certainly didn't miss it!"
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A lady rushes into the veterinarian and screams, "I found my dog unconscious and I can't...（查看全文）
1. How about never? Is never good for you?
2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's h...（查看全文）
BLAMESTORMING: Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, ...（查看全文）
A blonde went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain. "I would like to buy this TV," she to...（查看全文）
TheTacoBellChihuahua,aDobermanandaBulldogareinadoggiebarhavingadrinkwhenagood-lookingfemaleColliecom...（查看全文）
As I was trying to pack for vacation, my 3-year-old daughter was having a wonderful time playing on ...（查看全文）
1. Theylikethewords.
2. Girls,attimes,thinkthatthe"words"areimportant.
3. ...（查看全文）
Thereisalittleboyandalittlegirlinthewoods. Thelittle
girlaskedthe...（查看全文）
Q:HowmanyBillClintonsdoesittaketochangealightbulb?
A:Two--Onetopromisehe'lldoitbetterthananyoneelsea...（查看全文）
"IT'SAGUYTHING"
Translated:"Thereisnorationalthoughtpatternconnected
withit,andyouhavenochanceatallo...（查看全文）
How many doctors does it take to change a light bulb?
* That depends on whether it has health insu...（查看全文）
He tells you that his last good case was a Budweiser.
When the prosecutors see who your lawyer is, ...（查看全文）
10. Cats' facial expressions.
9. The need for the same style of shoe in different colors.
8. Why...（查看全文）
One day the teacher wanted the class to use the word definitely in a sentence. Suzy raised her hand ...（查看全文）
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat; if it'...（查看全文）
Three doctors are in the duck blind and a bird flies overhead. The general practitioner looks at it ...（查看全文）
The father was reading the school-report which had just been handed to him by his hopeful son. His b...（查看全文）
Sunday School teacher: Hands up all those who want to go to Heaven? Hands up...what about you, Terry? You haven't got your hand up, don't you want to go to Heaven?
Terry: I can't. My mum told me to go straight home.（查看全文）
A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off...（查看全文）
"Mum, teacher was asking me today if I have any
brothers or sisters who will be coming to school."
"That's nice of her to take such an interest, dear.
What did she say when u told her u are the only child?"
"She just said, 'Thank goodness!'"
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Patient : I'm in a hospital! Why am I in here?
Doctor : You've had an accident involving...（查看全文）
It is my sad duty to report that the Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and comp...（查看全文）
One student to another:"How are your English lessons coming along?"
"Fine, I used to be the one who couldn't understand the English men, and now it's the English men who can't understand me."
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1. Let's wash the car.
2. Has anybody seen the sideburn trimmer?
3. Come to think of it, I'll have...（查看全文）
A Mexican bandit made a specialty of crossing the Rio Grande from time to time and robbing banks in ...（查看全文）
Anewguyintownwalksintoabarandreadsasignthathangsoverthebar:FREEBEERFORTHEPER...（查看全文）
"Doctor, I have an ear ache."
2000 B.C. - "Here, eat this root."
1000 B.C. - "That root is heathen,...（查看全文）
1.Theystartpayingeveryoneinseashells.
2.TheDairyQueenonthecorneristhreateningahostiletakeover.
3.W...（查看全文）
There was a blonde that was so sick of blonde jokes she died her hair red. The jokes stopped and she...（查看全文）
笑话大全
